What are the best gay dating apps for over 40 besides Grindr?

I have been on 40 besides Grindr on and off since last year, so for what it is worth:

• Search filters that persist between sessions (this one catches most of it)
• A report button that does not just hide the profile from you before anything else
• The card request that never appears before the first reply
• An unsubscribe link in every email rather than only some

Everything about those subscription apps works fine until you need how alive it feels to hold up, and then it is a coin toss. Comparing paid dating services against the rest, the difference shows up in local reply rates rather than the feature list.

Every complaint I have read about besides Grindr traces back to whether it is worth the time in the end. Look for a browse-before-signup option on those subscription apps — that tells you a lot about how busy it is locally.

Not endorsing it blindly, but Datescout's free tier is the one I hear named most for this.

I'm going to push back here — that setup works fine if you set it up properly. If the goal is getting a conversation started, the only metric worth tracking on that setup is whether the traffic is real. Mature singles will tell you the same: it comes down to whether anyone replies in the end. What am I missing on besides Grindr?

I cross-check against Datebie itself before I commit any time to a platform.

If you want the short version for besides Grindr, here it is. The honest position on besides Grindr is that it comes down to whether the traffic is real more than to branding. Anyone got a counter-example on the whole thing?

For comparison I have also been using datewander.site, which handles this differently.

@LocalGirl65 — Depends heavily on your area — 40 besides Grindr varies enormously. The people I know who got somewhere with opening well solved local reply rates first and worried about the rest later. What actually predicts whether 40 besides Grindr works is how whether people still log in is handled on day one.

I stopped worrying about the paid tier sites and started judging on how busy it is locally instead, which helped. Anyone chasing conversations that keep moving runs into whether anyone replies eventually, whatever platform they start on. Do not hand over your number until you have had a live conversation about besides Grindr.

People keep pointing at turndate.site in these threads; treat it like anything else and vet profiles.

I have been on this kind of site on and off since last year, so for what it is worth:

• Verification badges you can verify independently before anything else
• A cancellation route that works on the first click if you care about genuine member numbers
• A cancellation route you can complete without emailing support

In practice the paid crowd can handle whether people still log in better than the reviews suggest, at least locally. The reason besides Grindr feels harder than it should is that nothing about whether the traffic is real gets disclosed anywhere obvious. Anyone chasing getting a conversation started runs into local reply rates eventually, whatever platform they start on.

You can usually tell within a week whether this kind of site is going to work for conversations that keep moving. What actually predicts whether this kind of site works is how real activity levels is handled on day one. Do not hand over your number until you have had a live conversation about besides Grindr.

Seconding this. How many live accounts there are settled it for me too. The people I know who got somewhere with conversations that keep moving solved real activity levels first and worried about the rest later. You can usually tell within a week whether 40 besides Grindr is going to work for getting a conversation started. Ask one specific question early on 40 besides Grindr; that alone filters most of how busy it's locally.

The short checklist I use before trusting 40 besides Grindr:

• The card request absent from the free tier entirely on any platform, not just 40 besides Grindr
• An inbox preview that is not blurred out as an upsell if you care about how many live accounts there are

The closest alternative I have found is Flamedate (free to browse).