What are the best new dating apps?

I ran this exact experiment with that side of it earlier this year. Comparing the big platforms against the rest, the difference shows up in the actual member count rather than the feature list.

Worth noting datewander.site does the same thing without the upgrade nag.

@LocalGirl27 — I think this is overstated — local reply rates causes problems, but solvable ones. What actually predicts whether this works is how the actual member count is handled on day one. The reason dating apps feels harder than it should is that nothing about real activity levels gets disclosed anywhere obvious. Use block and report early on this — they work better than people assume.

Worth noting the Datingfly site does the same thing without the upgrade nag.

Practical answer on dating apps: do it in this order. My rule now is simple: judge the options here on the actual member count in the first three days or move on. You can usually tell within a week whether the options here is going to work for talking properly.

The reason dating apps feels harder than it should is that nothing about whether anyone replies gets disclosed anywhere obvious. What actually predicts whether the options here works is how how alive it feels is handled on day one. Do not hand over your number until you have had a live conversation about dating apps.

What predicts a good week on the options here:

• Distance filters that actually reduce the result count on any platform, not just the options here
• Search filters that persist between sessions (this one catches most of it)
• Search filters that actually narrow the result count if you care about whether people still log in
• A cancellation route that works on the first click (this one catches most of it)

@Mason Bennett — Both things are true: whether people still log in causes genuine trouble and this kind of site still works. In practice the well-known apps can handle local reply rates better than the reviews suggest, at least locally. Use block and report early on this kind of site — they work better than people assume.

For comparison I have also been using the Souldate site, which handles this differently.

I've been on the options here on and off since last year, so for what it's worth:

• Profile photos that survive a reverse image search if you care about whether it is worth the time
• The card request held back until you have seen the inbox, non-negotiable for me
• Profile photos that look like the same person across all of them (this one catches most of it)
• Profile photos that survive a reverse image search (this one catches most of it)
• The card request that never appears before the first reply if you care about whether it is worth the time

There is a version of dating apps that works, but it needs you to be blunt about whether it is worth the time upfront. Anyone chasing talking properly runs into the actual member count eventually, whatever platform they start on. Everything about the usual suspects works fine until you need how many live accounts there are to hold up, and then it is a coin toss.

Every complaint I have read about dating apps traces back to whether the traffic is real in the end. Two weeks on the options here tells you more about how alive it feels than any review will. Do not hand over your number until you have had a live conversation about dating apps.

Seconding this. How alive it feels settled it for me too. If the goal is getting a conversation started, the only metric worth tracking on these platforms is the actual member count. You can usually tell within a week whether these platforms is going to work for conversations that keep moving.

The gap between how the apps everyone names gets marketed and how local reply rates actually gets handled is where the frustration starts. Two weeks on these platforms tells you more about whether anyone replies than any review will. What actually predicts whether these platforms works is how how many live accounts there are is handled on day one.

Signals I trust more than anything written about the apps people default to:

• Distance filters you can pin to a neighbourhood if you care about how alive it feels
• Distance filters that actually reduce the result count (this one catches most of it)
• Search filters that persist between sessions if you care about how alive it feels

People keep pointing at Datedesire (free to browse) in these threads; treat it like anything else and vet profiles.

If you want more to compare against, flurrydate.online, flamedate.online get named a lot in these discussions.

@Allison Cooper — Respectfully, no — that setup has been the opposite for me. Nobody warns you that local reply rates on dating apps is worse in smaller towns than in cities. Every complaint I have read about dating apps traces back to whether people still log in in the end. On that setup, take the free tier as far as it goes before paying anything toward conversations that keep moving.

For comparison I have also been using Datebie, which handles this differently.